As I continue to come crashing back down to reality after the high from hosting our second fundraiser Soccer 4 Heroes this past weekend, (www.TheJoshProject.com/Soccer4Heroes) I found myself contemplating whether or not it is us as humans that choose the easy way in life, even if it negatively affects us.
Sunday March 15/15 I was experiencing every emotion known, as we prepared to host Soccer 4 Heroes. As the day unfolded I found myself completely overwhelmed with all the support we had and how successful the event itself was. I still can feel like that junior high student with zero belief in his abilities to be successful. Even though I have changed and grown over the last several years and we now have many positive examples to look back upon, my knee jerk reaction is still to think everything is going to fail.
It was after the weekend that I decided I really needed to explore the emotions that lead to this knee jerk reaction of gloom & doom. I realized that these thoughts weren't coming from the present version of Josh, these were stored away many years ago and they still rear their ugly head whenever the opportunity presents. It's like the idea of you being scared at age 40 of all dogs, because you were harassed by one particular dogs aggressive behavior when you were age 8. We have to find ways to eliminate old thoughts and reactions so that we may progress to where we should naturally be physically and emotionally.
Oddly enough, the one song I've always found annoying, "Happy" by Pharell Williams, began playing and before turning it off out of frustration, I listened to the whole song. I have definitely been known to have interesting views on things, this is yet another example. Could it be possible that a song like "Happy" actually sets us up for disappointment?? I know you're probably thinking what the heck is wrong with a guy who can think negatively about a song called "Happy", but just hear me out. Are any of us truly happy all the time? I doubt it. It only takes a brief moment to be taken away from happiness. What if people listening to that song began to think that there must be something wrong with them if they aren't happy. What would be more unsettling to you, a person who showed a multitude of emotions or a person who every time you saw them or interacted with them they had a big smile on their face and everything was just awesome? I personally would be a lot more intimidated by Mr. Happy. Maybe if we got rid of the word happy and understood that we should strive to be content as much as possible, things would get a bit easier.
The other idea I kept thinking about was this idea of making an easy choice, even though it could have negative results. I began talking with a friend and colleague about the word depression. If depression is a mental illness and as wide spread as the media describes it, I wonder what would be easier for an individual that was wondering if they themselves are depressed/mentally challenged. If I'm unsure of what I'm experiencing physically and emotionally, but a powerful and large group (the media) tells you that all these symptoms you are experiencing means you are depressed, where does that leave me? It means I have a choice. I can choose to believe that I am like the majority they describe and I'm depressed. Isn't that the easy choice? I now have an excuse for why I feel how I do, I have a name for it, I can get band-aid fixes to help me with it, I can get a doctors note to assist me when I'm not feeling "normal" and I have a loving group of other "depressed" individuals who are anxiously waiting to greet me with love and support because I am just like them. Sounds like any other exclusive club somebody would want to be a part of.
This is where the easy and hard comes into play for me. I believe it's easier for me to accept and acknowledge that I'm depressed, than it is to figure out why I'm having these thoughts and emotions and how can I make them stop. It's like on the one hand you get to watch movies with your friends on a couch eating popcorn because you've accepted your fate as a depressed individual (and all the bonuses that comes with) or you get out there and climb Mount Everest because you are not willing to accept that you cannot change the patterns of thought you currently have! It's much easier to tell myself I'm a drug addict and that way I can stop fighting what must already be a part of me, than it is to tell myself that I can get these cravings under control and I can stop anything I want to stop.
It is us who controls the outcome and I don't know about you, but I'm fighting until the day I die. I will not have any other individual tell me who I am, or what is wrong with me. I will accept that there will be days that suck, days that are awesome and everything between. I will do everything in my power to look at all these days with the same set of eyes in order to not get too excited, when the day is awesome and I will also do my best to not get too disappointed, when the day sucks. We need to remember that we are humans that send rockets into space and we invent supercomputers that can clone sheep, but we are supposed to believe that we can't get rid of thoughts we no longer need or have use for? That's like me handing you a brand new computer and saying it can do everything, but you can never reset it or wipe it clean!
As always I never want to take away from anything anyone is ever feeling or experiencing and my number one piece of advice is always to find someone to help you if you feel anything is not right physically, emotionally, mentally and/or spiritually. Everyone needs help and just because you do, that doesn't mean there is anything wrong.
Love and light to you all!
Sunday March 15/15 I was experiencing every emotion known, as we prepared to host Soccer 4 Heroes. As the day unfolded I found myself completely overwhelmed with all the support we had and how successful the event itself was. I still can feel like that junior high student with zero belief in his abilities to be successful. Even though I have changed and grown over the last several years and we now have many positive examples to look back upon, my knee jerk reaction is still to think everything is going to fail.
It was after the weekend that I decided I really needed to explore the emotions that lead to this knee jerk reaction of gloom & doom. I realized that these thoughts weren't coming from the present version of Josh, these were stored away many years ago and they still rear their ugly head whenever the opportunity presents. It's like the idea of you being scared at age 40 of all dogs, because you were harassed by one particular dogs aggressive behavior when you were age 8. We have to find ways to eliminate old thoughts and reactions so that we may progress to where we should naturally be physically and emotionally.
Oddly enough, the one song I've always found annoying, "Happy" by Pharell Williams, began playing and before turning it off out of frustration, I listened to the whole song. I have definitely been known to have interesting views on things, this is yet another example. Could it be possible that a song like "Happy" actually sets us up for disappointment?? I know you're probably thinking what the heck is wrong with a guy who can think negatively about a song called "Happy", but just hear me out. Are any of us truly happy all the time? I doubt it. It only takes a brief moment to be taken away from happiness. What if people listening to that song began to think that there must be something wrong with them if they aren't happy. What would be more unsettling to you, a person who showed a multitude of emotions or a person who every time you saw them or interacted with them they had a big smile on their face and everything was just awesome? I personally would be a lot more intimidated by Mr. Happy. Maybe if we got rid of the word happy and understood that we should strive to be content as much as possible, things would get a bit easier.
The other idea I kept thinking about was this idea of making an easy choice, even though it could have negative results. I began talking with a friend and colleague about the word depression. If depression is a mental illness and as wide spread as the media describes it, I wonder what would be easier for an individual that was wondering if they themselves are depressed/mentally challenged. If I'm unsure of what I'm experiencing physically and emotionally, but a powerful and large group (the media) tells you that all these symptoms you are experiencing means you are depressed, where does that leave me? It means I have a choice. I can choose to believe that I am like the majority they describe and I'm depressed. Isn't that the easy choice? I now have an excuse for why I feel how I do, I have a name for it, I can get band-aid fixes to help me with it, I can get a doctors note to assist me when I'm not feeling "normal" and I have a loving group of other "depressed" individuals who are anxiously waiting to greet me with love and support because I am just like them. Sounds like any other exclusive club somebody would want to be a part of.
This is where the easy and hard comes into play for me. I believe it's easier for me to accept and acknowledge that I'm depressed, than it is to figure out why I'm having these thoughts and emotions and how can I make them stop. It's like on the one hand you get to watch movies with your friends on a couch eating popcorn because you've accepted your fate as a depressed individual (and all the bonuses that comes with) or you get out there and climb Mount Everest because you are not willing to accept that you cannot change the patterns of thought you currently have! It's much easier to tell myself I'm a drug addict and that way I can stop fighting what must already be a part of me, than it is to tell myself that I can get these cravings under control and I can stop anything I want to stop.
It is us who controls the outcome and I don't know about you, but I'm fighting until the day I die. I will not have any other individual tell me who I am, or what is wrong with me. I will accept that there will be days that suck, days that are awesome and everything between. I will do everything in my power to look at all these days with the same set of eyes in order to not get too excited, when the day is awesome and I will also do my best to not get too disappointed, when the day sucks. We need to remember that we are humans that send rockets into space and we invent supercomputers that can clone sheep, but we are supposed to believe that we can't get rid of thoughts we no longer need or have use for? That's like me handing you a brand new computer and saying it can do everything, but you can never reset it or wipe it clean!
As always I never want to take away from anything anyone is ever feeling or experiencing and my number one piece of advice is always to find someone to help you if you feel anything is not right physically, emotionally, mentally and/or spiritually. Everyone needs help and just because you do, that doesn't mean there is anything wrong.
Love and light to you all!
