I trust that most of us have shaken off the holiday hangover and we are all diligently back to somewhat regular routines. As I began to clear the cobwebs it was clear that a few things were lingering.
During the holidays we typically have an abundance of social time and for me one moment really sticks out. It was one of those moments that you just can't shake and as much as I tried to play it off, there was little I could do to keep the wheels from turning. A close friend and I had a lengthy discussion about the world as we see it! I know, real light, holiday fun, kind of talk!
It was incredible to me how many things we agreed were so backwards about our world and how frustrated it made us feel. Don't get me wrong, I definitely don't think this was a revolutionary conversation by any means! In fact I'm sure every generation has had talks like the one we had, I guess now it's our turn.
Maybe it has something to do with how I am now the parent and even though I still feel like a child inside, I am very aware of how I perceive and analyze things differently. If nothing else I am thankful for all the communication my 7 year old and I have, as it helps me remember what is truly important!
One comment he recently made to me was actually the catalyst for the discussion I had over the holidays. My son came to me after watching some approved children's television and he asked me why it is that he watches and listens to things on TV that are supposed to be for kids, but if he went to school and acted or spoke like the TV show he'd get in trouble. It really got me thinking because often times I've asked myself the same question as I hear the words stupid, dork, shut up loser and many other inappropriate comments and themes coming from shows like iCarly, SpongeBob, Jimmy Neutron, Johnny Test and many more!
Now I am definitely a very hands on father, so before this becomes a TV ratings rant, I want to make it clear that I believe that my relationship with my son is the determining factor in what offsets this phenomenon. But what about all the other kids who don't have a parent that is always around, always taking to you and who already runs a youth charity so kids are his specialty? Trust me when I tell you that the average youth I meet is easily as daring, has more disdain for authority and is way more outspoken then I ever was. The difference being that when I did it, I stuck out like a sore thumb, nowadays, these types of behaviors are almost routine.
If television, music, internet and media haven't stepped their game up as far as contributing to the delinquency of minors, what else could be the cause? I'm pretty sure that Madonna, who was extreme in the early 80's, is not comparable to Rihanna of present. But maybe they are the same and it's I who have changed. Okay, so then the next logical thought would be the shift in parenting and the family structure. Now this is something I believe we can all agree has undergone major transformations!!
In my opinion the average parent/family are fighting an uphill battle that they may never win. With the cost of living, lack of sticking together as a family, work and most importantly the media and all our wonderful handheld devices, how do we even stand a chance? Nintendo, XBOX and Playstation all have the ability to go online, browse internet, access YouTube & Netflix and much more. So even if you bought all the right game titles, video game time can very quickly become, "let's search the internet and see what we find", time.
I can share more than a few of the awesome explanations I've had to give when my son returns from his mom's house and he tells me about all the new things he's seen on his WiiU and YouTube. My personal favourite had to be the time he came and asked me about a video where Batman is shown smoking drugs, getting drunk and being a criminal. That was a fun one.
Just to quickly make the leap to more "mature" television, I have to speak of Two & A Half Men, even though there are many shows you could use for the same examples. I'm not going to be ridiculous here, but it is something to talk about. This show is one of the highest rated shows on TV and it's definitely a humorous and entertaining show, but let's have a quick look at something. Almost every single episode depicts women as bimbos, whores and typically only valued for sex, they regularly smoke pot and talk about it all the time, not to mention how much they glorify it and alcohol and being drunk is always good.
Now if I as an adult can scratch my head at some of this, just imagine what a child, adolescent or teen is thinking when they watch this? Youth under the age of 25 do not process things the way we do as adults. Their minds are not capable at filtering all this crap on their own. The most amazing thing is these are American Television shows and American Prisons are filled mostly with drug users. So of course their television shows should encourage the youth to get drunk, get high and have many one night stands?? Before you tell me that these shows are for adults and they are on at night, think back to a few paragraphs ago where I mentioned online access! Today's youth are much better with technology then we ever were and they can find anything! Not to mention re-runs of these show play in the afternoon as well.
In other words we have to be so diligent watching and communicating with our children or else... Yet in our world watching and communicating with our children seems to be in major decline! All I know is I hope there are a few more adults out there like me who don't just watch the television and sit there and laugh, they too think about how much these things affect the world around us and the youth that will be taking over one day.
If we can all acknowledge that a child growing up with a loud, obnoxious and rude parent has a very high chance of showing these characteristics from a young age, then is it so far fetched that in our world today when so many youth are raised by a television, computer, nanny or older sibling who is unqualified for the job, they are losing the fight?
At The Josh Project (www.TheJoshProject.com) we do everything in our power to ensure that all children grow to become successful adults. Hopefully a few of you out there feel the same way!
Love and Light to all.
During the holidays we typically have an abundance of social time and for me one moment really sticks out. It was one of those moments that you just can't shake and as much as I tried to play it off, there was little I could do to keep the wheels from turning. A close friend and I had a lengthy discussion about the world as we see it! I know, real light, holiday fun, kind of talk!
It was incredible to me how many things we agreed were so backwards about our world and how frustrated it made us feel. Don't get me wrong, I definitely don't think this was a revolutionary conversation by any means! In fact I'm sure every generation has had talks like the one we had, I guess now it's our turn.
Maybe it has something to do with how I am now the parent and even though I still feel like a child inside, I am very aware of how I perceive and analyze things differently. If nothing else I am thankful for all the communication my 7 year old and I have, as it helps me remember what is truly important!
One comment he recently made to me was actually the catalyst for the discussion I had over the holidays. My son came to me after watching some approved children's television and he asked me why it is that he watches and listens to things on TV that are supposed to be for kids, but if he went to school and acted or spoke like the TV show he'd get in trouble. It really got me thinking because often times I've asked myself the same question as I hear the words stupid, dork, shut up loser and many other inappropriate comments and themes coming from shows like iCarly, SpongeBob, Jimmy Neutron, Johnny Test and many more!
Now I am definitely a very hands on father, so before this becomes a TV ratings rant, I want to make it clear that I believe that my relationship with my son is the determining factor in what offsets this phenomenon. But what about all the other kids who don't have a parent that is always around, always taking to you and who already runs a youth charity so kids are his specialty? Trust me when I tell you that the average youth I meet is easily as daring, has more disdain for authority and is way more outspoken then I ever was. The difference being that when I did it, I stuck out like a sore thumb, nowadays, these types of behaviors are almost routine.
If television, music, internet and media haven't stepped their game up as far as contributing to the delinquency of minors, what else could be the cause? I'm pretty sure that Madonna, who was extreme in the early 80's, is not comparable to Rihanna of present. But maybe they are the same and it's I who have changed. Okay, so then the next logical thought would be the shift in parenting and the family structure. Now this is something I believe we can all agree has undergone major transformations!!
In my opinion the average parent/family are fighting an uphill battle that they may never win. With the cost of living, lack of sticking together as a family, work and most importantly the media and all our wonderful handheld devices, how do we even stand a chance? Nintendo, XBOX and Playstation all have the ability to go online, browse internet, access YouTube & Netflix and much more. So even if you bought all the right game titles, video game time can very quickly become, "let's search the internet and see what we find", time.
I can share more than a few of the awesome explanations I've had to give when my son returns from his mom's house and he tells me about all the new things he's seen on his WiiU and YouTube. My personal favourite had to be the time he came and asked me about a video where Batman is shown smoking drugs, getting drunk and being a criminal. That was a fun one.
Just to quickly make the leap to more "mature" television, I have to speak of Two & A Half Men, even though there are many shows you could use for the same examples. I'm not going to be ridiculous here, but it is something to talk about. This show is one of the highest rated shows on TV and it's definitely a humorous and entertaining show, but let's have a quick look at something. Almost every single episode depicts women as bimbos, whores and typically only valued for sex, they regularly smoke pot and talk about it all the time, not to mention how much they glorify it and alcohol and being drunk is always good.
Now if I as an adult can scratch my head at some of this, just imagine what a child, adolescent or teen is thinking when they watch this? Youth under the age of 25 do not process things the way we do as adults. Their minds are not capable at filtering all this crap on their own. The most amazing thing is these are American Television shows and American Prisons are filled mostly with drug users. So of course their television shows should encourage the youth to get drunk, get high and have many one night stands?? Before you tell me that these shows are for adults and they are on at night, think back to a few paragraphs ago where I mentioned online access! Today's youth are much better with technology then we ever were and they can find anything! Not to mention re-runs of these show play in the afternoon as well.
In other words we have to be so diligent watching and communicating with our children or else... Yet in our world watching and communicating with our children seems to be in major decline! All I know is I hope there are a few more adults out there like me who don't just watch the television and sit there and laugh, they too think about how much these things affect the world around us and the youth that will be taking over one day.
If we can all acknowledge that a child growing up with a loud, obnoxious and rude parent has a very high chance of showing these characteristics from a young age, then is it so far fetched that in our world today when so many youth are raised by a television, computer, nanny or older sibling who is unqualified for the job, they are losing the fight?
At The Josh Project (www.TheJoshProject.com) we do everything in our power to ensure that all children grow to become successful adults. Hopefully a few of you out there feel the same way!
Love and Light to all.
Well said, Josh.
ReplyDeleteToday's society and media specifically, can have a very negative impact on youth of all ages.
It is up to us as parents to both limit the intake (as much as we can, given that in it of itself is an uphill battle) of negative media, and also to have as much open dialogue as possible to ensure that the wrong impressions are not being made when exposure is inevitable.
At the end of the day, if we spent more time with our kids and less time 'elsewhere', the exposure in turn would be reduced and the impact would be nothing but positive.
Thanks Jaybee!
DeleteI really like the points you make in your comments. I couldn't agree more. Even for myself, I took quite the financial blow being available for my son, but I'm confident it is the best investment I could ever make.
Nice Blog Joshua. This is why most parents only let their kids watch PBS, CBC Doc and Discovery. The stimulus on TV is all wrong. You should definitely share with mommy bloggers.
ReplyDeleteThank you Lowell. Yes I agree and it really takes a strong determination, because those channels you mention are great for kids under 5, but older kids aren't interested.
DeleteI will share as I can, good point.
Just wait until he is a teenager. I have been watching a popular teen show, One Tree Hill . WOW! High School students drinking constantly, even working at and going to clubs. One couple is married and they are just juniors. Another is living in her own apartment because her parents moved and she didn't want to. AND of course they are all having sex. These shows with blurred boundaries and inappropriate behavior cause stress and confusion for our kids. Lori Lite ~ Stress Free Kids
ReplyDeleteGreat point Lori! Don't I know it. I'm certain this is just the beginning, but I welcome the challenge. I signed on to be a dad, I know its the most important job I'll ever do in this lifetime.
DeleteHope you're well. Thanks for commenting :)
I loved your post Josh. Well said and so true.
ReplyDeleteThank you very much! I appreciate it.
Delete